How to Treat Your Server Like a Human

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After several years as a waitress, there are some things I just need to say!!!!  If you care about behaving like a decent person when you go out to a restaurant, here  is some advice from one who knows!!!  And for the sake of this post, the personal pronoun “I” really stands for ALL SERVERS you will ever meet in life.

1. Don’t act like I’M inconveniencing YOU when I come to the table!  You’d be amazed at how many times I’ve gotten rude facial expressions or even words, telling me to “Go away, we’re not ready yet”  or something after I’ve given a table plenty of time to decide on their order.  If you want to take your time and aren’t in a rush, just tell me that nicely in the first place.  Otherwise I’m going to assume you came in to actually EAT so don’t get fresh with me for trying to serve you promptly!

2. Realize what’s going on around you, and that I’m not the only one serving you.  I take your order, but the bartender makes the drinks, and the cooks make your food.  Hence, if your drink order is taking awhile, it’s not my fault!!!  Same goes for the food.  If you see me hovering at the bar pleading with the bartender to hurry it up, know that I am doing my best for you!

4. Order preemptively.  If I come by and ask if anyone wants another drink, and you are anywhere close to finishing yours and know you will want another, just order it!  There is nothing more annoying than a large table where one person asks for one more thing each time I bring something to the table.  Get in sync, people!  I should not have to make six consecutive trips just to get you one more round!

3. If you’re going to complain, have a solution in mind.  I hate it when people tell me something is wrong but then reject every offer I make to correct the problem!  First of all, if something is wrong with your dish, stop eating it and tell me ASAP!  “Problems” reported about things you’ve already practically finished will NOT be taken seriously.  Duh.  But, if you don’t want your food remade, don’t want to speak to the manager about a discount, or don’t want a free dessert, why are you even telling me???  You are a complainer for complaining’s sake and I’d rather just not hear about it if you’re not going to let me fix the problem.

4.  Something small but significant:  make it obvious when you’re ready to pay!  Stick the cash or credit card out of the top of the little black book, and stand it up or put it somewhere different on the table.  I HATE it when people just stick their card inside and leave it exactly where I placed it.  That makes me have to guess whether or not there is something in there, and believe it or not I am not psychic.  And there is nothing more awkward then having to go up to a table and ASK if I should take the check.  If you’re not ready, it just makes it seem like I am rushing you, when really I was afraid that I was keeping YOU waiting.  So stick your freakin’ credit card out the top, people!!!

5. Don’t think you can make up for a bad tip by being super nice to me.  This is known as the “verbal tip.”  Honestly, it’s just like an extra-hard slap in the face.  If you’re really nice and complimentary the whole time, then I’m going to expect a good tip.  Not getting one from such nice people makes me lose my faith in humanity.  I can’t take your compliments to the bank.

6. I make $4.35 per hour.  That’s NOTHING.  My checks are like a bonus.  I live on tips.  20% OF YOUR BILL IS THE NORMAL TIP FOR A GOOD SERVER!!!!  (I’m talking to you Euros, you’re in America now.)  So, you should always start with the idea of tipping 20%.  If the service is bad and it is clearly the server’s fault, you can deduct.  If the service is AWESOME, or you feel like being extra generous, feel free to tip over 20%!!!  But you should never tip less than 20% for good service in this day and age.  Also, guess what?  I don’t even get to keep all of those tips you give me.  At the end of the night, I give 10% of my total tips to the bartender, another 10% to the busser, and 5% to the host.  So I only even keep 75% of the tips I make!!!!  Also look at it this way: when you tip me, you’re also tipping everyone else who’s working to serve you!

I’m sure I will think of more of these later so perhaps I will add to this post.  But for now, keep this post in mind next time you go out to eat!  What do you think?  Have you done any of these things I just warned about?  Or are you always an awesome customer and appalled that others are not?

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21 responses »

  1. “Hence, if your drink order is taking awhile, it’s not my fault!!! Same goes for the food.”

    This one is only true IF: your server truly put in the order completely correctly and they brought it out as quickly as they could correctly as they could notice without touching the food. Now, if it’s another server, then if the order was put in correctly by the original server that took the order, then the other server has to serve the food without any obvious errors such as a wrong side dish, missing side of ranch, etc., anything that the person bringing it out would not have to TOUCH to notice the mistake, because that server has a ticket to verify the food with. The original server has their written order to verify the food with automatically if the original server delivers the food.

    1. WHEN do you put in my order? Do you wait or do you go put it in immediately after taking it? If you are double sat or triple sat, you can still go put in each order into the computer after taking each table’s order. By not doing that can result in a much longer wait and that would be YOUR FAULT.

    2. FORGETTING to put in an order. My husband and I have experienced this for REAL that servers ADMITTED to our faces they have FORGOTTEN TO PUT ORDERS IN. All of them were appetizers, bar drinks, and a cup of soup.

    3. Did you put in the order CORRECTLY into the computer? Have had many times servers ADMITTED to our faces they did not do that correctly. Have had wrong entrées before due to our server putting in the order wrong. Have had wrong bar drinks too due to the server putting in the order wrong.

    4. Did you FORGET ANYTHING I ORDERED such as a SIDE DISH? We have had this happen a number of times as well.

    5. Did you DROP anything I ordered? Luckily, we have not had this happen, but I have seen a server once drop some fries from a plate before and I did have a waiter spill some margarita martini when pouring into a martini glass. In other words, it is possible, not likely, but very possible.

    6. Did you remember to GET my food? We have had a server do that before. Also, we have had a number of servers forget bar drinks.

    7. Did you bring out my food obviously correctly if you bring my food out? Do you realize how many times OUR OWN SERVER brings out DUH mistakes like the side dish is wrong, the entrée is wrong, something obvious is not correct bacon that isn’t covered up isn’t extra, extra crispy when you can clearly notice that it isn’t without touching anything, etc.? Every DUH mistake you bring out is YOUR FAULT I am waiting for what I did order by you wasting my time bringing me the wrong item or wrongly prepared item or forgot something. While we all make mistakes, I would have to say a good 90% of the time, servers NEVER COMPARE THE WRITTEN ORDERS TO THE FOOD, because they are TOO LAZY and DON’T CARE!!

    If it’s another server, it still doesn’t make it the kitchen staff’s fault I have the wrong side dish for example since that is something that’s obvious. It’s either my server that didn’t put in my order correctly or this other server that didn’t compare the ticket to the food or that this other server did compare the ticket to the food, but just missed it(HIGHLY UNLIKELY, but possible).

    So QUIT LYING to the public, because what you are saying isn’t true MOST of the time. MOST of the time, your server had SOMETHING to do with HOW LONG YOU waited for your food or bar drinks. I didn’t say always, but most of the time, your server is WHY you are waiting longer in general. That is the truth, you can’t argue with facts. I KNOW, WE EXPERIENCED IT!! My husband and I have been going out to eat just about almost every weekend(2-3 times a weekend) since Nov. 2000 since we met, so we know more than you do!!

    I also thought about some more things that the server can control with how long you wait for your food:

    1. Once, we had a Red Lobster waitress had our 2 entrées on the tray as well as 2 side salads that were for a couple that wasn’t even there when we ordered. Anyway, instead of bypassing their table to hand us ours first since WE DID ORDER FIRST(common sense would tell you that it takes more time to cook food than it does to fix a side salad anyways even if it wasn’t our server that delivered our food, but it was our waitress that delivered our food), she decided to hand them theirs first off the tray. THAT IS SOMETHING THAT IS IN THE SERVER’S CONTROL TO HAND OUT THINGS OFF THE SAME TRAY IN THE ORDER IN WHICH IT WAS ORDERED IN!!

    2. Once, we had a waitress that greeted us which we ordered an appetizer as well as our drinks when greeted. I saw she tucking in chairs at empty tables and pretty much doing everything but coming back to get our entrée order. Well, I found out what happened. She brought out our appetizer and when I asked she said that she wanted to wait to put in our entrée orders. The thing is, that delayed us more by not at least coming to GET our orders. That way, when the appetizer was ready, we wouldn’t have gotten delayed eating our appetizer since we then had to give our entrée orders when we could have given our entrée orders WELL BEFORE THAT and we would have gotten our entrées faster due to that she could have just left to put our entrée orders into the computer after delivering our appetizer instead of taking time to order when our appetizer was sitting in front of us.

    The point is, SHE delayed our entrées as well as to be able to start eating our appetizer because she could have at least TAKEN our entrée orders and then when our appetizer would have been brought out, could have immediately gone to the computer to put our entrée orders in.

    What she did was make us wait while our hot appetizer was sitting in front of us, we couldn’t touch it, because we had to order our entrées and could have done that wayyy before that.

    She also delayed our entrées because we had to spend extra time AFTER our appetizer arrived to give her our entrée orders when we could have done that wayyyy before that.

    3. Once, we had a waitress that assumed that because they were out of raspberry topping for a cheesecake slice when we had ordered dessert that she’d bring us strawberry. Turns out, she knew when she put in the order that the computer had it the manager told us. So she did it on PURPOSE to be so lazy and uncaring as to not come to ask if we wanted the next closest thing. We didn’t, we sent it back, so she had MORE WORK. Also, she didn’t even think about what if someone is allergic to strawberries. I just honestly can’t believe someone would do that. If they are out of something, common sense would be to come to see if the next closest thing is ok. Not everyone wants the next closest thing. So it wasn’t like it was just getting the order wrong by accident or by not verifying the written order with what she was bringing or putting in the order wrong by accident, this was on PURPOSE to be LAZY and to ASSUME. I didn’t know at first that she did that. I thought at first she just was that stupid(or truly just messed up(highly doubt it)) to bring us strawberries on top of a cheesecake when we ordered raspberries.

    4. Your server delays coming to get your order or delays you ordering due to personal conversation. We have had that before as well. Once, we had a waiter that we didn’t know after waiting 15 mins. for a table on Mardi Gras day ask us BEFORE we ORDERED ANYTHING “How’s y’all’s Mardi Gras” “Go to any parades.” See, I don’t mind chit chat with a stranger, but be considerate to do it AFTER we have our orders into the computer so you don’t take up our time. THAT was in the server’s control as well. We have also had servers not come to get our order due to playing around. That’s in the server’s control too.

  2. “4. Order preemptively. If I come by and ask if anyone wants another drink, and you are anywhere close to finishing yours and know you will want another, just order it! There is nothing more annoying than a large table where one person asks for one more thing each time I bring something to the table. Get in sync, people! I should not have to make six consecutive trips just to get you one more round!”

    While I understand that, a lot of the times the servers can’t remember all of the stuff ALL because they are too LAZY TO WRITE THINGS DOWN!!

    I have before for example asked for a box, the check, a bag, and a to-go coke. Our waitress was TOO LAZY to write those requests down and forgot the bag. If she would have written it down, less off the tip due to she would have taken some EFFORT into trying to remember what was said.

    In other words, asking for 6-7 things at once is honestly NOT the best thing. The server usually forgets anyways, so it’s for nothing and it just pisses me off more.

    I try to ask for everything at once, but 9 times out of 10, it’s for NOTHING!!

    I have asked for 3 things once, which a waiter forgot, which were more bread, a refill, and extra napkins. He didn’t write those down and forgot the napkins. See, WHAT’S THE POINT IF THE SERVER DOESN’T TAKE *ANY*********EFFORT******* INTO TRYING TO REMEMBER? WHY BOTHER ASKING FOR MANY THINGS AT ONCE?

    I also time and time again have forgotten condiment issues even when our own server delivers the food that they don’t compare their written orders to the food or don’t even write down orders.

    My point is, you most likely WILL be making lots of trips anyways. It’s for nothing to ask for everything at once. I keep trying, but I am sick of the LAZY AND UNCARING servers out there that don’t write down stuff. It doesn’t have to be an order to write down things. I would have to write down the check, refills, etc. if I were a server, because I would for sure forget stuff a hell of a lot more since I have a bad short term memory.

  3. “But, if you don’t want your food remade, don’t want to speak to the manager about a discount, or don’t want a free dessert, why are you even telling me??? You are a complainer for complaining’s sake and I’d rather just not hear about it if you’re not going to let me fix the problem.”

    The customer complains if it’s an issue that is the server’s fault because they want to let you know WHY the tip is not up to par, DUHHH!! Anyone that has common sense would know this, DUHH!!

    If it’s not a server issue, they may be afraid of spit in food or something like that why they don’t want it remade or just maybe don’t feel like sending it back due to time as well as the trouble it is to do so, but that doesn’t mean they can’t be honest with you if they aren’t happy with the food.

    You should rather here it. It may tell you WHY your tip is bad. You may not notice the customer’s food is wrong due to you either not checking the food for obvious errors that you don’t have to touch the food to notice the mistake or just truly missed something or possibly find out from your order you rung up that you rung it up wrong after the fact, so YES, you should want to know so you can IMPROVE your service to your customers to make more money. You also may find out the customer is punishing you for a cook’s error as well and if they don’t tell you, you won’t know. If they lie and say they just were full, you would just write them off as cheap. So YES, I feel you should be told even if the customer doesn’t want the situation fixed, because some people don’t have time to get it fixed due to possibly being on a lunch break or something like that. Did you ever consider that? I would rather know than not know and have the customer complain so I can do something about it if it was my fault or if it was someone else’s fault, report the issue to the manager or if it’s the manager’s fault, talk to the manager about the issue so it wouldn’t happen again and again.

    • Springs1. I hope that I never have to serve you. Very few lazy people take jobs at restaurants. It’s hard work, and I can tell from your comments that you’ve never even considered that kind of work. So, until you can put yourself in the shoes of the people who work hard for you, I suggest keeping your ignorant comments to yourself.

      Also… you can always go to the grocery store and cook and serve your self if you hate going to restaurants as much as your posts would suggest.

      • Holly
        “I hope that I never have to serve you.”

        That’s because you are lazy. Also, I know the truth and you just don’t want to admit I am right.

        “Very few lazy people take jobs at restaurants.”

        I see lazy servers ALL THE TIME!! You have NO CLUE OF WHAT you are talking about.

        For example, We had a waiter once admitted he grabbed the wrong entrée from the kitchen. It was just me and my husband. Our waiter didn’t compare the WRITTEN ORDER with the entrées he was bringing out most likely, but also we saw he had other entrées for another table on the tray that he put on the tray jack that he didn’t ONCE get his pad of paper out to see WHICH ENTRÉE WENT WITH WHICH TABLE!! So 2 times he could have caught his mistake, but didn’t *****TRY HIS BEST AS HE SHOULD HAVE!

        He admitted that he grabbed the wrong entrée from the kitchen. He brought my husband fried shrimp w/fries when he ordered crawfish au gratin w/baked potato. Those items look NOTHING A LIKE, but yet THAT WAITER WAS TOO LAZY AND UNCARING TO VERIFY *WHAT* HE WAS BRINGING US!!

        So you don’t see that as lazy? Seriously, all it takes it some effort by comparing the written order to which table and which seat it goes to which I **SAW*** he didn’t. I saw him AIMLESSLY handing out entrées.

        Another example, a waitress that wasn’t our waitress once brought me an open-faced burger without the extra crispy bacon, pickles on the side of the plate which I ordered it with no pickles, and the side of ranch was missing. I seriously doubt our waitress actually put in the order wrong for all THREE of those DUH mistakes, especially since I had ordered my bacon extra crispy that she wouldn’t have forgotten to put that at least most likely. It was only me and my husband at the table, which he ordered his “AS IS” even.

        Well, anyway, I could easily tell with it in her hand about the duh mistakes, especially the bacon, so I lost it, I told her in not a so nice way about the issues considering I could EASILY TELL THERE WAS NO WAY IN HELL SHE VERIFIED THE PLATE TO HAVE THREE ITEMS OBVIOUSLY WRONG ON ONE PLATE OF FOOD!

        Her response was “I’M NOT YOUR SERVER!!” I told her as she was walking away “READ THE TICKET!”

        SEE what I mean about LAZY?

        It’s a hard job if you actually put forth **EFFORT** into the job. It wasn’t hard for her, because she just brought out 2 plates and had no clue if they were obviously correct or not.

        All of those errors can be noticed without touching the food.

        I get a lot servers that aren’t our original server or servers that are our original server take ONE appetizer to the table without the ONE side of ranch or TWO sides of ranch I asked for. WHY? It’s because it wasn’t a real mistake, it was being TOO LAZY ASS to READ THE WRITTEN ORDER AND COMPARE IT TO THE FOOD!!

        There are PLENTY of LAZY servers.

        Just look at this blog that this WAITRESS states that most servers are lazy. READ AND WEEP:

        http://stef319.hubpages.com/hub/Confessions-of-A-Food-Server

        Stef319 said:
        “I will agree that 90% of our servers ARE lazy. They drive me crazy; as lazy as they are with their tables (who are providing their tips), imagine how lazy they are when it’s time to do sidework and help clean the restaurant. They’re always on their cell phones, outside smoking cigarettes, flirting with the cooks, when they should be paying attention to their guests. And I bet they get your orders wrong all the time because you’re right-they are lazy. They expect a 20% tip always. They wonder why they get “stiffed” on a tip sometimes. It’s because they didn’t deserve a tip! That’s why I said that I don’t want other servers taking my food out. I don’t trust them at all. They don’t read the kitchen slips, they bring a steak out without a steak knife, they forget sides, and they auction off food. It ends up costing me more time cause not only do I have to apologize for their order delivery not being correct, but I still have to go back to the kitchen and get whatever they forgot. And god forbid that the guest asks THEM for something because not only will they not get it, but they won’t even have the courtesy to tell me what the table wanted.”

        See, you have ZERO CLUE OF WHAT THE HELL YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT!!

        “It’s hard work, and I can tell from your comments that you’ve never even considered that kind of work. So, until you can put yourself in the shoes of the people who work hard for you, I suggest keeping your ignorant comments to yourself. ”

        They aren’t ignorant, they are the TRUTH!! The TRUTH HURTS, DOESN’T IT?

        You are just mad, because HONESTY is coming out here. I KNOW MORE THAN MOST SERVERS DO ABOUT THE DAMN MENUS EVEN. I have proven even MANAGERS wrong on menu issues even, that’s how stupid they are and how SMARTER I AM, which I have never even been a server before or even worked at the restaurant even. There have been times I have proven servers wrong about things on the menus before.

        Once at a restaurant that it was our first time there which we didn’t stay most likely even an hour even, our waitress charged me for a side salad without an entrée when I did order an entrée. Anyway, it wasn’t busy at all, ONE couple and TWO people at the bar. I went up to her at the bar to ask “So why is the side salad $3.50?” She goes “It’s whatever is in the computer?” My JAW almost dropped for her RUDENESS and PURE LAZINESS. She didn’t even grab a menu to consider that she pressed the wrong button. Anyway, I had to grab a menu to show HER(HOW PATHETIC) where it had above the entrée I ordered it had “Add a side house salad or soup for $1.99 to an entrée.” She just left and didn’t even admit fault. Finally, she comes back and says “Sorry about the mistake.” See, that sorry was for her tip, not that she meant it. The reason why is because if I would have been the waitress in that situation, I would have NEVER blamed a computer(because even if it’s a wrong price, my server could have noticed and gotten it fixed from their manager BEFORE they brought us our check). I would have truly investigated it instead of been lazy and EXTREMELY UNCARING like that by when someone would have asked me why a price is a price, I would have grabbed a menu to see since I know by LAW you by the ADVERTISED PRICE, NOT what’s in the computer ANYWHERE even(a store or restaurant). I would have also asked the manager to comp the side salad for the customer’s trouble since it was only around $2 and if the manager wouldn’t, I personally would have taken $2 out my own pocket to show I cared. See, our waitress was very rude and uncaring, so stiff she got. You treat me as if you don’t care and want to be lazy, that’s the type of tip you get back, NOTHING!! See how **I** personally would have treated the customer as a HUMAN BEING instead of dollar sign? That was SOOO RUDE to tell me “It’s whatever is in the computer”, because we don’t order from the computer to have known anyways what was in the computer. With this situation, it wasn’t a wrong price in the computer; it was HER that pressed the wrong button. Our revised bill had “Add house salad to entrée” instead of just “HOUSE SALAD.” See, she pressed the wrong button.

        My point is, talk about lazy that she didn’t even want to GRAB A MENU, how pathetic!! She should have KNOWN that you could have added a side salad to an entrée without looking at the menu. She only cared about herself.

        My main point is, I don’t have to walk in the server’s shoes to know how to do the job CORRECTLY to at least TRY TO anyway, which none of the servers I talked about TRIED their best, did they? THEY WERE LAZY!!

        “Also… you can always go to the grocery store and cook and serve your self if you hate going to restaurants as much as your posts would suggest.”

        I don’t hate going to restaurants, I hate LAZY and UNCARING servers like yourself.

        The feeling is mutual, I wouldn’t want to get served by you since you seem lazy and uncaring, otherwise, you’d admit, YES, these issues are ALL TRUE that your server has lots of control of HOW LONG you wait for your food in different ways.

        Most servers ARE LAZY!! They make one trip for soft drinks and bar drinks instead of 2 trips, they don’t write down all requests like if you want extra napkins or a refill or even your order, and I have even had 3 servers tell me “You might have to remind me” when I ordered some condiments. MOST SERVERS ARE LAZY AS CAN BE!!

  4. Holly
    Another thing they do is lazy, I had once a waitress when I was in a party of 4 that AUCTIONED OFF soft drinks when SHE WROTE THE DRINK ORDERS DOWN EVEN, HOW LAZY AND PATHETIC IS THAT, HUH? She was like, “Who had the dr. pepper” “Who had the coke.” etc.

  5. Springs1: What do you do that you have so much time to sit around and write such long diatribes against the service industry? I’m curious…
    Your comments are basically missing one key element in my post: I’m writing this with the assumption that in all these scenarios the server doesn’t mess up. Because guess what? I freely admit that I do mess up occasionally and when that happens I will own up to it to my tables and I don’t expect a 20% tip. A GOOD SERVER SHOULD ALWAYS ADMIT WHEN SOMETHING IS THEIR FAULT…and I do!
    However, to respond to a couple of your comments:
    I ALWAYS put orders into the computer as soon as I take them. All good servers should do this. I’ve also never dropped food, and I make it a point to double check that the food I’m running to a table is all correct.
    As for not writing things down: Not having to write down orders is a sign of a good server!! It is not us being lazy!!! That being said, I’m realistic about this. If I have a table of 4 or more, I write down their order. For less than 4 people, I don’t need to! This is a personal characteristic that varies from server to server though. People with bad memories should write things down, but don’t assume that those of us who don’t are being lazy! Perhaps we just have a good enough memory after years of practice!!
    Complaining but not wanting a solution: This again goes back to whose fault the problem is. If something is wrong with your food that IS NOT THE SERVERS FAULT, that the SERVER HAD NO CONTROL OVER, and the server makes every attempt to rectify the situation, and you refuse all solutions, the TIP SHOULD NOT GO DOWN!!!! If I served you to the best of my ability and a problem that was completely out of my control arose, I still deserve 20%!!!
    I’ll be the first to admit that some servers at some restaurants are lazy. But all I can do is stand up for myself and my co-workers, who are most definitely NOT lazy. Take a look at where you are eating. If you are going to Red Lobster, you are going to be served by a bunch of college kids/part-time servers and it’s probably not going to be the best. Perhaps you should send some of your comments to the corporate headquarters of some of these chain restaurants to try and convince them to invest more time in properly training their servers. OR, if bad service really bothers you as much as it seems, might I recommend that you invest in QUALITY over QUANTITY and go out to nicer restaurants less often!!!!!

    • Carrie
      “If something is wrong with your food that IS NOT THE SERVERS FAULT, that the SERVER HAD NO CONTROL OVER, and the server makes every attempt to rectify the situation, and you refuse all solutions, the TIP SHOULD NOT GO DOWN!!!”

      Most of the time, it HONESTLY IS, HONESTLY, you know that is the GOD’S TRUTH, just admit it:

      Just ask yourself, are servers blind to notice something DUH OBVIOUS wrong on the plate without touching the food or illiterate that they can’t read an order?

      90% of the time it’s the SERVER’S FAULT:

      1. They can put in the order wrong into the computer or if it’s a written ticket they submit, they could have written something down wrong or hard to read.

      2. They could have forgotten to put in the order in the first place.

      3. Servers can also misunderstand what the customer is saying such as 2 times when I ordered 2 sides of bbq sauce and the stupid idiot servers thought I didn’t want bbq sauce on my ribs when I NEVER ONCE SAID I didn’t and I didn’t say “ON THE SIDE”, I SAID SIDES, which means extra. One of those times I said extra even.

      4. Most mistakes with food are visible:

      A. Condiments of any kind regardless of who brings out the food can be brought out by the server ahead of time.

      B. If someone orders extra crispy bacon with their pancakes, then the bacon looks limp, not stiff, and you can even see some white fat on it, guess what? MY SERVER COULD HAVE SEEN THAT TOO AND TOLD THE COOKS IT WASN’T CORRECT, TO RECOOK IT INSTEAD OF BRINGING IT TO ME WRONG IN THE FIRST PLACE!

      C. Any wrong side dishes or entrees are the fault of the server if they bring out the food even if they put in the order right. You can tell the difference between a baked potato and mac n’ cheese, yet, a waiter at Logan’s Roadhouse was so stupid as to bring me mac n’ cheese when I ordered a baked potato. I noticed it within 5 seconds of the food hitting my table. Like DUH a baked potato looks completely different from mac n’ cheese.

      D. Any MISSING side dishes, appetizers, condiments, or entrees ARE the server’s fault if they bring out the food as well. Have had that happen a few times or so. Our servers aren’t blind, so they can tell if something is missing or not.

      E. I have seen a red steak delivered to someone before at Outback which means let’s say the customer ordered their steak well done, that the server could have noticed the color difference as in your example “Steak cooked rare instead of well done ? It’s not your server’s fault, they didn’t cook it, it’s the kitchen’s fault.”

      F. If something LOOKS burnt such as a piece of bread with the food and the person didn’t order it burnt, my server is at fault for serving me that.

      G. If my server forgets an item that an entree or appetizer comes with, that’s their fault if they brought me my food without the item such as a side dish or ranch.

      H. I have ordered at Outback my fries “lightly cooked” “Not overdone and yellow not brown.” I have had their fries before cooked the way I like them before many of times before this time I am talking about. This stupid waitress decided to blame the kitchen staff for REALLY DARK BROWN FRIES as if she was blind or something and my husband even told me he could see that they were really dark. My husband may not agree with me on every subject of course, but with that, you could EASILY tell just by LOOKING that those fries were overdone and very dark. She said she put in the order correctly. I am thinking, SO? I wish I could have said “Are you blind?” That was HER FAULT she DECIDED TO SERVE ME THOSE FRIES THAT WEREN’T CORRECT. I noticed the mistake within 3 seconds of my food being placed in front of me.

      My server’s job isn’t just to bring out what the kitchen staff gives them, it’s also getting the order OBVIOUSLY correct to the table as much as possible in order to get that good tip. As someone said on a blog or forum “They just want to be tipped well and will do pretty much anything reasonable to get your money”, which that IS VERY REASONABLE to think OUR SERVERS ACTUALLY CARE ABOUT THEIR TIP TO GET THINGS RIGHT TO HAVE A BETTER TIP!!

      Get what I am saying here? MOST of the mistakes happen due to either your server if they bring out the food or another server that doesn’t compare the ticket to the food(assuming the order was put in correctly by the original server of course).

      You also can notice if someone has wing sauce “On the side” vs. “On the wings” themselves. This isn’t rocket science.

      Most of the things that are wrong with the food can be caught by the server if they bring out the food, even if they didn’t cook it. If it’s another server, they can catch obvious errors on the ticket and menu(such as menu states the item comes with bbq sauce and the ticket doesn’t say “no bbq sauce”) if the ticket was correctly put in by the original server that took the order. Condiments(in bottles or on the side in containers) can always be offered to be brought out ahead of time REGARDLESS of WHO brings out the food to the table.

      So most of the time when the food has something wrong with it, chances are, your server or another server could have caught the mistake before it got to you in most instances. I NEVER said ALL, but in most cases, it can be caught BEFORE bringing out the food(unless another server brings out the food with the ticket wrong), because then the original server that took the order is at fault for putting the order in incorrectly into the computer.

      There are few rare cases where the food being wrong is the kitchen staff’s fault such as raw food(such as raw chicken), slightly undercooked or overcooked food that you’d have to CUT into to know if it was under or overcooked, or anything the server cannot see with their eyes unless they were to TOUCH the food. Things such as a pickle under a bun the server can’t notice unless they lift the bun, so unless they put the order in wrong, they wouldn’t be at fault, but in general most food mistakes can be caught BEFORE bringing the food to the table.

      What I am saying is, MOST mistakes ARE PREVENTABLE by the SERVER if they bring your order to you that they can NOTICE things wrong by comparing those written orders to the plates of food.

      Once a waiter at Chili’s said “The kitchen forgot” when I had ordered 2 sides of mayo and 1 side of mustard. The thing is, my waiter brought out the food, so NO, HE HE HE HE HE FORGOT, the kitchen staff didn’t step out the kitchen to bring me my food and forget obvious missing containers from my plate that aren’t covered up by anything. MY WAITER DID THOUGH!!

      You walk in one room in your house with a plate of food, but forget the ranch. Even if your mom or significant other plated your food, which you even told her you wanted a side of ranch for your fries, but you bring it to another room. HOW IS THAT THEIR FAULT? It’s YOUR FAULT YOU LEFT THE ROOM WITHOUT THE RANCH AND DIDN’T NOTICE IT SINCE IT’S SOMETHING OBVIOUS YOU DON’T HAVE TO *TOUCH* TO NOTICE THE MISTAKE!!

      Even if he didn’t bring out the food, that waiter could have prevented that type of thing from being forgotten since it needs no cooking to bring it out ahead of time. It is always the person bringing out the food that is at fault for any type of mistake that you don’t have to TOUCH the food to notice the mistake, unless of course, the order was put in wrong by the original server that took the order with another server bringing out the food. Of course unless, the kitchen goofs up, making it correctly even if the ticket is wrong, but that’s highly unlikely scenario.

      I cannot believe you honestly think that the server is not at fault for most food mistakes. WE LIVED THROUGH THE “DUH” MISTAKES, SO WE CAN SEE WITH OUR EYES WHO WAS AT FAULT!!

      I wrote this from above:

      “For example, We had a waiter once admitted he grabbed the wrong entrée from the kitchen. It was just me and my husband. Our waiter didn’t compare the WRITTEN ORDER with the entrées he was bringing out most likely, but also we saw he had other entrées for another table on the tray that he put on the tray jack that he didn’t ONCE get his pad of paper out to see WHICH ENTRÉE WENT WITH WHICH TABLE!! So 2 times he could have caught his mistake, but didn’t *****TRY HIS BEST AS HE SHOULD HAVE! He admitted that he grabbed the wrong entrée from the kitchen. He brought my husband fried shrimp w/fries when he ordered crawfish au gratin w/baked potato. Those items look NOTHING A LIKE, but yet THAT WAITER WAS TOO LAZY AND UNCARING TO VERIFY *WHAT* HE WAS BRINGING US!! So you don’t see that as lazy? Seriously, all it takes it some effort by comparing the written order to which table and which seat it goes to which I **SAW*** he didn’t. I saw him AIMLESSLY handing out entrées.”

      It’s very rare that it’s not the server’s fault. Things like if I order no pickles if you took my order and brought out my food, which there are some pickles under a bun that you’d have to lift it to see it, unless you admitted putting in the order wrong, I will assume it’s the kitchen staff that is at fault and probably is.

      Things like raw chicken tenders aren’t the fault of the server unless they are pink or something.

      A slightly over or undercooked steak if the order was put in correctly is not the server’s fault.

      Also, some people assume things as well, that end up being wrong.

      My point is, MOST of the time, the server can prevent mistakes from getting to the customers and it IS INDEED MOST OF THE TIME THEIR FAULT THE CUSTOMER RECEIVES THE MISTAKES.

      If another server brings out a wrong side dish or if they are missing items other than condiments, no it’s not the server’s fault if they put in the order correctly, but it still counts against the tip. It’s part of the service.

      Why also is it when you say “no pickles” or “ONLY lettuce and onions”, they still have a pickle on the plate? WHY you servers can’t understand that if the customer states they don’t want pickles, that means on the plate, because otherwise, they’d specifically state they would have wanted it “ON THE SIDE.” Think about it. WHY do I keep having servers bring me some pickles on the plate when I ordered no pickles? NO SERVERS ARE BLIND OR ILLITERATE that they cannot determine any of the obvious errors that don’t have to be touched to notice the mistakes or mistake.

      Your server has control over if they bring you the completely wrong food or not if they were your server, if they forgot an item, if they brought it out with obvious things wrong such as bbq sauce on ribs when the person ordered it without bbq sauce, LIKE DUHH, it’s plain obvious if ribs have sauce on them to ***DECIDE TO SERVE THAT OR NOT**, because see you have a written order.

      “If I served you to the best of my ability”

      Serving best to your ability doesn’t mean you didn’t mess up in other areas. You can try your best and still mess up something. We are human, we mess up.

      Sure, I agree if you did your best and something that happened you couldn’t control such as cold as the refrigerator food(meaning the cook didn’t cook the food enough) or a steak cooked incorrectly when you put in the order correctly(assuming 99.9% of the time you can’t tell just by looking), that you should get 20% or more if EVERYTHING else went well. It’s not just getting the order correct. You have many other reasons why the tip may not be up to par such as making a person wait 10 minutes or more for their check or to be rung up, unless you can clearly see it’s that busy or an overcharge(we have had a bunch over the years, how fast you get refills, etc.

      “Not having to write down orders is a sign of a good server!! ”

      No, it’s a sign of laziness. WHY? Let’s say you don’t write it down and mess up, well, you got what you deserve in the tip, a not-so-great tip for the LITTLE EFFORT you put into trying to remember what I said. If you get it right, SO WHAT? I would rather not be worried the entire time that my order will come out wrong, personally and most of the rest of normal society feels the same, honestly.

      I have had for example, a lazy waitress told me “I can remember up to 15 people”, guess what? I asked her at least twice if she needed to write it down, she REFUSED. She forgot the bar drink I ordered(I ordered it when I ordered my meal) and she forgot the mustard. See, how LAZINESS is what I see in people like that. They THINK they can do it, but we are all human, WHY RISKS GETTING IT WRONG, HUH? It was a very modified burger and fries order.

      Let’s see if you could get this right without writing it down:

      Burger with only:
      lettuce
      onions
      cheddar cheese
      bacon- extra crispy

      fries no salt, not overdone

      2 sides of mayo
      1 side of mustard
      1 side of ranch

      Could you get that correct along with my husband’s “AS IS” order(he is not a picky eater, I am though and always have been since I was a kid).

      Just curious if you feel you wouldn’t need to write that down? I would like to know your opinion?

      I absolutely despise when servers come back to the table to asks what you said all because they were too lazy to write your order down. For instance, once a waiter decided not to write down my order, he came back when he was putting in our orders and said “Did you say lettuce and tomatoes only”, when I had said “Lettuce and onions only.” It was only us 2 those times and most of the times we eat out.

      Also, I have more problems with other issues as well. For example, I have asked a server for a box, a go-coke, a bag, and the check. The waitress forgot the bag. This happens QUITE OFTEN. I try to not run my server and they end up being too lazy to write it down, so they run themselves. I don’t ask for one thing at a time, so I wish they would write it down, then they have a lists to go by. Sure, you can and even I have missed things before even if it was written down, but in general, most of the time, I don’t forget something if I write it down such as a grocery lists.

      My point is, writing down ALL REQUESTS should be a must. If you say you mess up, well guess what, that’s WHY you should TRY YOUR BEST instead of be lazy. Trying to remember things by writing it down is trying your best at first and then you go back to that written order to reread it line by line. THAT would be trying your best.

      If you get it right 99.9% of the time, fine, don’t write things down, I am just saying from most of our experiences, the servers that did not write things down, MESSED UP SOMETHING whether it was a minor issue like a bag forgotten or a major issue putting in an order wrong or forgetting to put in an order.

      “nicer restaurants”

      Nicer restaurants have some of the worst service honestly. I have been to some fine dining restaurants, some of the service was worse than the chain restaurants, for real. it all has to do with the PERSON serving you.

      “What do you do that you have so much time to sit around and write such long diatribes against the service industry? I’m curious…”

      I work in an office, 40hrs a week.

      “I’m writing this with the assumption that in all these scenarios the server doesn’t mess up.”

      A large majority of the time, the server does mess up. We have had overcharges on our bill, even rung up credit cards on the wrong table, and wrong prices. You may say you can’t change the price, well, your manager can and you can read a menu just as we can to notice the wrong price, considering you know the only price that matters is the advertised price on the menu, not the computer since we don’t order from the computer.

      We have had servers forget to put in orders, forget to bring out orders, put in orders wrong, bring out obviously wrong food or drinks, etc.

      Some of the times, it’s another server that delivers the food wrong and your server put the order in correctly, but it still is part of the person’s service, so why is it fair to the customer to pay well for bad service just because the original server didn’t do the problem, the other server did? It’s not our fault that the system isn’t fair that this person is sharing the tip you make in most cases.

      My main point is, servers have LOTS Of control with your food if it’s delivered OBVIOUSLY correct or not.

      • “Things like raw chicken tenders aren’t the fault of the server unless they are pink or something.

        A slightly over or undercooked steak if the order was put in correctly is not the server’s fault.

        Also, some people assume things as well, that end up being wrong.”

        Wow, you’re full of examples, so let me see if I can come up with some of my own!
        I once served a woman an entree involving some chopped butternut squash. I checked on her table a couple times and it wasn’t until the third time I went over to refill her water that she told me the squash was underdone. That is another example of something I could not have known without cutting or tasting her food. Kitchen mistakes happen more than you would think.
        Also, people do order things stupidly all the time. For example, I had a woman order Fish Tacos from me without any inquiry as to how the fish was cooked and what type of tortilla was used. When I brought out her tacos, with breaded/fried catfish and flour tortillas, she said “Oh no, I’m gluten free! I can’t eat these!” Was I supposed to be psychic and KNOW she was gluten free without her saying? Or should she have ASKED me when she ordered TACOS if there was any gluten involved???

        “Let’s see if you could get this right without writing it down:

        Burger with only:
        lettuce
        onions
        cheddar cheese
        bacon- extra crispy

        fries no salt, not overdone

        2 sides of mayo
        1 side of mustard
        1 side of ranch”

        Yes, I do think I could remember that. If, however, a table of two begins ordering things with a lot of modifications and special requests, you betcha I will pull out my notepad and write it down! I agree with you that it is ridiculous to try to remember 15 orders, but it is all about knowing your own capabilities. I AM NOT BEING LAZY BY NOT WRITING DOWN AN EASY ORDER FROM THREE PEOPLE. I AM SAVING TREES!!!

        Yes, we do have lots of control over what happens and it is inevitable that we mess up occasionally. It is not an easy job. I hope that you appreciate when you get good service (though from your experience it sounds like it happens rarely) and that you tip accordingly.

  6. I wasn’t going to comment on this, but I just have to remind everyone that people are human and mistakes happen. Getting good service at a restaurant is more than timing, more than getting things right the first time, etc. I, too, have had some experiences like Springs1, but I am not going to make sweeping generalizations from them. If the service isn’t what i like, I don’t go back.

    • Laurie
      “If the service isn’t what i like, I don’t go back.”

      Then you’d be missing out on some other great servers most likely and you would never go anywhere honestly. We go out every weekend just about 2-3 times a weekend at times and have been doing it since Nov. 2000 when we met. We have had many experiences, good and bad.

      If you don’t go back, it would honestly have to be a manager issue for me to not go back or that no servers are any good after giving the restaurants several tries.

      “but I just have to remind everyone that people are human and mistakes happen.”

      While it’s true we all make mistakes, a lot of the mistakes happen due to laziness though by not writing down things, not checking orders for obvious errors, not comparing the menu prices to the check prices, etc.

  7. Carrie
    “If something is wrong with your food that IS NOT THE SERVERS FAULT, that the SERVER HAD NO CONTROL OVER, and the server makes every attempt to rectify the situation, and you refuse all solutions, the TIP SHOULD NOT GO DOWN!!!”

    Most of the time, it HONESTLY IS, HONESTLY, you know that is the GOD’S TRUTH, just admit it:

    Just ask yourself, are servers blind to notice something DUH OBVIOUS wrong on the plate without touching the food or illiterate that they can’t read an order?

    90% of the time it’s the SERVER’S FAULT:

    1. They can put in the order wrong into the computer or if it’s a written ticket they submit, they could have written something down wrong or hard to read.

    2. They could have forgotten to put in the order in the first place.

    3. Servers can also misunderstand what the customer is saying such as 2 times when I ordered 2 sides of bbq sauce and the stupid idiot servers thought I didn’t want bbq sauce on my ribs when I NEVER ONCE SAID I didn’t and I didn’t say “ON THE SIDE”, I SAID SIDES, which means extra. One of those times I said extra even.

    4. Most mistakes with food are visible:

    A. Condiments of any kind regardless of who brings out the food can be brought out by the server ahead of time.

    B. If someone orders extra crispy bacon with their pancakes, then the bacon looks limp, not stiff, and you can even see some white fat on it, guess what? MY SERVER COULD HAVE SEEN THAT TOO AND TOLD THE COOKS IT WASN’T CORRECT, TO RECOOK IT INSTEAD OF BRINGING IT TO ME WRONG IN THE FIRST PLACE!

    C. Any wrong side dishes or entrees are the fault of the server if they bring out the food even if they put in the order right. You can tell the difference between a baked potato and mac n’ cheese, yet, a waiter at Logan’s Roadhouse was so stupid as to bring me mac n’ cheese when I ordered a baked potato. I noticed it within 5 seconds of the food hitting my table. Like DUH a baked potato looks completely different from mac n’ cheese.

    D. Any MISSING side dishes, appetizers, condiments, or entrees ARE the server’s fault if they bring out the food as well. Have had that happen a few times or so. Our servers aren’t blind, so they can tell if something is missing or not.

    E. I have seen a red steak delivered to someone before at Outback which means let’s say the customer ordered their steak well done, that the server could have noticed the color difference as in your example “Steak cooked rare instead of well done ? It’s not your server’s fault, they didn’t cook it, it’s the kitchen’s fault.”

    F. If something LOOKS burnt such as a piece of bread with the food and the person didn’t order it burnt, my server is at fault for serving me that.

    G. If my server forgets an item that an entree or appetizer comes with, that’s their fault if they brought me my food without the item such as a side dish or ranch.

    H. I have ordered at Outback my fries “lightly cooked” “Not overdone and yellow not brown.” I have had their fries before cooked the way I like them before many of times before this time I am talking about. This stupid waitress decided to blame the kitchen staff for REALLY DARK BROWN FRIES as if she was blind or something and my husband even told me he could see that they were really dark. My husband may not agree with me on every subject of course, but with that, you could EASILY tell just by LOOKING that those fries were overdone and very dark. She said she put in the order correctly. I am thinking, SO? I wish I could have said “Are you blind?” That was HER FAULT she DECIDED TO SERVE ME THOSE FRIES THAT WEREN’T CORRECT. I noticed the mistake within 3 seconds of my food being placed in front of me.

    Continued next posts:

    • Springs1 ~~ You’re ignorant. You obviously have never served before. Your “opinions” have no merit here, and until you’ve actually done this type of work — for at least 2 weeks — you cannot possibly justify them, nor are you entitled to speak about something you know absoulutely nothing about!

      • Leeney16
        How am I “ignorant” if *I* have been THROUGH the issues I have talked about, huh?

        I do know more than you, that’s why you are just MADDDDDD!!

        I am VERY ENTITLED when crap service happens to ME. SO STFU UNCARING BITCH!!

  8. Also, I’d like to point out that the original intent of this post was merely to shed some light into what work is like for us servers, and to give less-knowledgable customers a few tips on what they can do to be better patrons. These comments have gotten far away from the main point, which everyone SHOULD agree on: You should treat your server courteously and respectfully when you dine out!

  9. Springer you are so fuckin annoying i feel bad for any restuarant u and ur husband go to i already know you are one of those customers that walks in the door and all the waitresses fight over who gets u cuz no one wants u!!!! U wanna talk about lazy umm u are fuckin lazy w all the times u go out to eat shit … being a server is anything but lazyiness ha u are a fuckin joke

    • Amber
      I agree that i am too lazy to cook, but it’s not a joke that the server is lazy, because if they want YOUR MONEY, they need not to be so LAZY ASS as to not check over the things they hand you for obvious errors and you KNOW what I am saying is the TRUTH!! Why can’t you just admit it, huh?

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